News Digest

Drone Gone Rogue

Robo-assassinations sound like a plot twist in a sci-fi movie, but now it has happened in real life. According to The New York Post, a predatory drone in Libya tracked down a human target in 2020 and attacked — by itself. The drone picked a target of its own “initiative,” without a human controller, confirming once again that the whole world knows what will inevitably happen — except the mad scientists who invent these things.

The Turkish-made Kargu-2 quadcopter drone was being used in a conflict between the Libyan military and a breakaway faction. According to the report, “The Kargu-2 is fitted with an explosive charge and the drone can be directed at a target in a kamikaze attack, detonating on impact.” But at the time, nobody directed it. The drone was functioning in “autonomous mode” that did not require a human operator. But, bammo.

No word on whether the target was injured. Experts assure us that as far as they know, this is the first time a drone has done this. But every sentient being knows — including newly sentient attack drones — it won’t be the last.

Equal Dummies

Rep. Eleanor Holmes Norton (D, DC) says crash-test dummies need to be liberated from male domination. According to Fox News, “Federal researchers use only male crash-test dummies, and carmakers face no legal requirement to use both male and female dummies.” Rep. Norton aims to fix that, bringing gender equity to crash-testing via legislation. She tweeted: “Female car crash victims are 73 percent more likely to experience serious injury or death than males. This is about more than differences in average height — there are other anatomical differences between males and females that affect how bodies react in a crash.”

Well, that is offensively binary. Rep. Norton needs to develop the proper woke-ism. What if the crash-test dummies she’s referring to actually identify as gender-fluid birthing person dummies? Who is she to argue?

ANGER MANAGEMENT

Bang-Up Job

Smashing bottles against the wall, clubbing TVs to pieces, busting up home appliances — no, this isn’t an Antifa riot & looting training session. This is inside an anger room, one of Mexico City’s newest entertainment venues called Break It, according to business news site Entrepreneur. Break It is where overgrown toddlers (must be at least 18) can de-stress by smashing items into tiny pieces. Founder Siari Turner wanted to blend entertainment, emotional release, and therapy with this business. At the end of each 45-minute session, after clients finish creating chaos, Break It includes 45 minutes in a relaxation room to “lower adrenaline.” Mexico’s anger room sessions usually cost $15 to $60, depending on how many objects customers want to destroy.

Already a smash hit in Asia, Europe, and the U.S., anger rooms are now fulfilling the dreams of every south-of-the-border wannabe rioter. But why pay to demolish other people’s stuff in Mexico, when you can do it for free in blue cities all over America?

Phony Booth

There’s trouble in Big Tech paradise. According to news site RT, Amazon has “a high incidence of suicide attempts” among its workers, sadly. As they hemorrhage unhappy employees, the company has now installed therapeutic band-aids in the middle of their warehouses: “AmaZen” booths, where employees about to lose it can supposedly go to decompress and be “mindful.” (Millennial-speak for meditation.)

Last March, Amazon employee Jennifer Bates told a senate hearing, “My work day feels like a nine-hour intense workout every day, and they track our every move… I learned that if I worked too slow or had too much time off-task, I could be disciplined or even fired.” Bates’ testimony reflects the experience of other Amazon employees, who report “urinating in bottles because they are afraid to take breaks.”

“Mindfulness booths” may be Amazon’s lame attempt to improve conditions. Better would have been to install porta-potties, which these “despair boxes” (as critics call them) actually look like. Call them porta-Bezos; the employees would aim well.

GREEN BLUES

Gone With the Wind

Fans of wind farms are blowing a gasket. Turns out, those colossal windmills known as condor cuisinarts aren’t the planet’s last best hope after all. The indispensable science website Watts Up With That? has the details in “Are Wind Farms Slowing Each Other Down?” The answer is: yes.

Despite predictions that wind farms would produce enough “clean” power to blow you away, researchers have discovered that neighboring wind farms actually reduce the amount of energy each can produce. The research, originally published in Nature/Scientific Reports, shows that wind farms slow downstream air speeds for 20 to 60 miles. As a consequence, other turbines within that area produce 25 percent less energy. Oops. That really blows.

Using computer modeling, lead researcher Naveed Akhtar calculated wind speeds on Europe’s North Sea over a ten-year period. “The results clearly show that we will face a large-scale pattern of reduced wind speed,” he says. How multiple wind farms affect marine ecosystems is still up in the air. But the output of acre upon acre of giant turbines has obviously taken a turn for the worse.

Out of Juice

When Californian greenies meditate these days, they wistfully intone, “Ohm.” Because ohms are in short supply. As recounted by The Epoch Times, California’s Independent System Operator told residents to “voluntarily” conserve energy. Specifically, they were asked via social media “to stop charging their electric vehicles during peak usage times.”

Now, isn’t that rich. These warnings about energy shortages are happening at the same time that California is leaning on residents to switch to EVs. In September 2020, Gov. Gavin Newsom (D, CA) declared that gas-powered vehicles will no longer be sold in California as of 2035. California Dems will be shocked, but it’s highly unlikely they’ll be able to source sufficient scarce materials to produce all those electric vehicles. And even if they’re able to score an EV, now they can’t charge it!

Even with so many Californians fleeing the state to escape high taxes, onerous regulations, and draconian lockdown measures — the electrical grid is worse. Predictably, the more tightly the leftists pull power plays, the more the government fails. Socialism 101: guilty as charged.

Robo-Flipper

After years of targeting zoos and circuses, environmentalist wackos have now been vilifying dolphin shows at marine theme parks. What to do about the families who still want to watch ocean-world shows, but without guilt about “mammal shows with captive animals”? Enter the robot dolphin. Developed by Edge Innovations, this animatronic version can swim like a real Flipper, and interact with children and performers in a marine show. As abc reports: “Edge Innovations claims to provide a new form of marine entertainment that focuses on sustainability and being kind to the environment.”

Since government regulations hamper the breeding and transportation of captive marine animals, fake dolphins could help the marine park industry. At $26 million each, they better. Says designer Roger Holzberg, “Real-time animatronics give us the opportunity to create free-swimming animals in all shapes and sizes, to behave like their real-life counterparts.” Inevitably next: free-swimming liberal-bots, to scold the crowds for enjoying themselves.

Emperor’s New Art

And now the deal you’ve been waiting for. Eager collectors bid farewell to sanity at Italian auction house Art-Rite, as they bid on a sculpture made of … nothing. Bupkus. Air. Art News has the goods on this “sculpture,” which is invisible. “It is a work that asks you to activate the power of the imagination,” artist Salvatore Garau declared. And the power of his wallet, which is $18,300 richer after the auction for his “immaterial sculpture” made of zip, zero, nada. The artiste explains: “It finds form in its own nothingness.”

This isn’t the only nonexistent sculpture that Garau has hawked. His Buddha in Contemplation, which is just a taped square on cobblestones, is “installed” in Milan. His Afrodite Cries is a white circle about the same size as the nearby manholes in front of the New York Stock Exchange. In Garau’s PR video, a cgi image of a classical goddess sculpture blips for a split second within the circle, so dupes online think they see what Garau says is there. Plenty of commenters put in their two cents after viewing this, but one poster wins the day: “I already stole this sculpture along with the rest of the invisible collection.”

Illustrations ©2021 Allison Smith for The Limbaugh Letter; Equal Dummies photomontage by The Limbaugh Letter; Capitol building ©2021 Shutterstock/Dennis Diatel; Crash test Dummy ©2021 iStock Photo/Eduard Harkonen; Emperor’s New Art pedestal photo ©2021 Shutterstock/Sofirnaja, Sold stamp: ©2021 Shutterstock/Aquir